Metta and the practice of generosity
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The gift of full attention
Giving your whole attention to someone is one of the highest gifts we can make.
If you’ve ever had the experience of talking with someone who really knows how to listen then you’ll know what I mean. There’s something incredibly affirming about having someone really listening to us. When it happens we feel valued, and we consequently take ourselves more seriously.
Because of this we’re often able to learn a great deal about ourselves. And of course this is something we can do for others as well. We can learn to become good listeners. The mindfulness of breathing practice helps us to develop the skill of letting go of distracting thoughts so that we can be more fully present for another person.
The metta bhavana meditation practice helps us to value others more highly so that we want to give them our full attention.
Being aware of when we negate generosity
But we also need to be aware of the ways that we tend to negate this kind of generosity. Sometimes we take peoples’ time and energy without due regard for whether the other person really wants to be with us.
We can take people for granted by not giving them praise.
We can undermine people and take away their initiative and confidence by carelessly critical comments.
We have these choices, almost in every moment of every day; to take or to give, to act generously and with regard to the welfare of another or to act selfishly.
With practice we can become able to choose to act more generously.
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