How to grow from your regrets

June 24, 2016
wildmind meditation news
Self-compassion is a skill that can be learned: How To Stop Beating Yourself Up (MP3) by Bodhipaksa
Kira M. Newman, Greater Good Science Center: According to a new study, self-compassion may help us benefit from regret rather than wallowing in it.

Sometimes, regret is a deadweight that we carry through life, slowing us down and making our shoulders ache. But other times, it turns into a kind of fuel; it propels rather than hinders, motivates rather than distracts.
What’s the difference between these two outcomes? A new paper by researchers at UC Berkeley suggests that it might be self-compassion.

The researchers recruited 400 adults and …

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Don’t beat yourself up

January 2, 2012

Most people know their less than wonderful qualities, such as too much ambition (or too little), a weakness for wine or cookies, something of a temper, or an annoying tendency to rattle on about pet interests. We usually know when we make mistakes, get the facts wrong, could be more skillful, or deserve to feel remorseful.

Some people err on the side of denying or defending these faults ( a word I use broadly here). But most people go to the other extreme, repeatedly criticizing themselves in the foreground of awareness, or having a background sense of guilt, unworthiness, and low confidence.

It’s one thing to call yourself to task for a fault, try to … Read more »