Sometimes, regret is a deadweight that we carry through life, slowing us down and making our shoulders ache. But other times, it turns into a kind of fuel; it propels rather than hinders, motivates rather than distracts.
What’s the difference between these two outcomes? A new paper by researchers at UC Berkeley suggests that it might be self-compassion.
The researchers recruited 400 adults and …
Bodhipaksa, founder of the online meditation centre Wildmind (www.wildmind.org), is facilitating a workshop on the art and practice of self-compassion, in Chicago on July 31, 2016.
Do you give yourself a hard time when things don’t go the way you plan? Do you find it hard to accept your faults? Do you criticize yourself a lot? Do you give yourself a harder time than you would ever give a friend or family member? If so, you’re not alone—and you might benefit from practicing self-compassion.
Research has demonstrated that those who rate highly on self-compassion scales are psychologically healthier … Read more »
At this point in your existing or budding relationship you probably know the crucial basics about one another: Human? –Check; Approximate age/height? –Check, check; Occupation? –Check; Do you practice self-compassion in your life? -Uh, no…why on Earth would that matter? Well, I’m glad …
But the good news is that we can learn to cultivate self-compassion. Which is vital. Self-compassion helps us to meet life’s challenges in a supportive way …
In the field of education it’s common to assume that self-esteem and academic performance are closely linked, and that if you want to maximize students’ potential you need to boost their self-esteem.
Its also common to hear that bullies are people with low self-esteem, and that if you want them to be more respectful of others then their self-esteem needs to be boosted.
Most of this received wisdom has been shown to be highly questionable, or even untrue. It seems that people who do well academically have high self-esteem as a result—not the other way around.
And I’m sure almost every student can think of times they were convinced they were going to fail an … Read more »
Most of us are far too hard on ourselves. We doubt our own worthiness. We talk to ourselves unkindly and often sacrifice our own well-being in order to “get things done.” Often we fear that if we stop criticizing ourselves we’ll cease to perform well.
Paradoxically, though, it’s people who lack self compassion who are more prone to stress and burnout, while self-compassionate individuals are more emotionally resilient, better able to face challenges, and overall more effective.
Self-compassion can be learned. It arises from developing four skills:
We all long for someone who will love us unconditionally. But what if that person is us?
Most us us have the habit of being hard on ourselves. We talk unkindly to ourselves and often we sacrifice our own well-being in order to “get things done.” We blame ourselves when things go wrong, and often fear that if we stop doing so we’ll cease to perform well.
On this weekend retreat, Bodhipaksa will introduce a step-by-step guide to self-compassion, so that we can learn to be more gentle with and understanding of ourselves.
On this weekend we’ll have a gentle program … Read more »
I remember a very long time ago when I first started to try to make meditation a daily practice, I had a very hard time being sincere each time I sat for meditation. I was trying it because I was …
You know what to do, but so often manage to do the opposite. You know you should go to sleep. But instead of picking your body up from the couch, you pick up the television remote. You have work to get done, but spend 20 minutes surfing online for stuff you’ll …
Lara Fielding, Huffington Post: Now that the holiday shopping is (mostly) finished, and we look to the New Year, perhaps it is a time when you may be selfish… in the best sense of the word! Building your self-awareness is the best gift you can give yourself, and ultimately to share with those you love.
Before you can know what you need, you have to know how to listen to your needs. While we tend to believe we know ourselves pretty well, the skill of self-awareness is not always intuitive. Our true authentic needs often get buried under layers of encrusted patterns of beliefs …