Mindfulness in daily life

mindfully sweepingMeditation is not something that we just do for 20 or 40 minutes every morning and then forget about.

Meditation involves a principle of awareness that you can practice in every moment of your life.

While the time that we spend on the cushion most definitely has an effect on the quality of our emotional and mental life in the rest of the day, making an effort to practice mindfulness during so-called “ordinary” activities such as working, driving, doing housework, and spending time with our friends and families is a very powerful practice.

We often see these things as impediments to practice. In fact an interesting thing is that a lot of people fall into the habit of using the word “practice” as a shorthand for “meditation practice.” So they’ll say things like, “My practice is going very well. I’ve been sitting every day.” And this implies that the rest of our lives is “not practice.” But in fact, anything we do can be part of our practice, which I’d broadly define as the ongoing effort to cultivate mindfulness, compassion, and an awareness of things’ ungraspability.

So we can use eating as a practice. We can use driving as a practice. We can use showering, or shaving, or taking a leak as a practice.

No matter what we’re doing, we can always be more mindful when we’re doing it. No matter what we’re doing, we can always be kinder and more compassionate; even when we’re on our own, we can be kind with ourselves, or show an attitude of kindness and care in the way we handle objects. And we can always — always! — recognize when we’re hoping on in some way (to feelings, to anticipated outcomes, to thoughts) and learn to let go.

Living mindfully in this way is incredibly enriching. It helps prevent the arising of unpleasant states of mind such as stress and depression, and it also helps us to live with freedom, dignity, and with respect for ourselves and others.

Living with mindfulness brings us into the field ethics, of talking about how best we can live our lives. But it also is a way of living meditatively.

This section of the site will develop into an extensive guide to applying the principles of meditation to your daily activities.

We’ve started with a section on bringing Metta (lovingkindness) into your everyday life, and more information on mindfulness. Soon, we’ll add other tools to help you live with more awareness.

61 Comments. Leave new

  • wayne a marshall
    December 28, 2007 7:01 pm

    i would like to try a new way of thinking in all things

    Reply
  • i would be glad if you could teach me what you are suppose to think of while meditating.

    Reply
    • Please be aware that you are thinking. Once you think of something, it will ask you to follow. You have to stop this to happen. When you are thinking, be aware that you are thinking. If you do not have anything to do, focus on your breathing.
      Do not expect anything. Just do mindfulness.

      Reply
  • Hi Mikal,

    we have some extensive guides to meditation on our site. I’d suggest starting with the mindfulness of breathing practice and move on to the development of lovingkindness meditation.

    All the best,
    Bodhipaksa

    Reply
  • I would like a meditation for anxiety and panic attacks, to relieve them.

    Reply
    • Hi Kathaleen,

      Panic attacks are not something that I know much about, but I’ll see if I can find a meditation teacher who has some experience in that area.

      All the best,
      Bodhipaksa

      Reply
  • hi ive suffered from depression all my life looking for answers in meditation got any suggestions?

    Reply
  • Dh. Chandrabodhi
    August 17, 2009 2:17 am

    A very detailed and helpful article. I would like to keep in touch about more such articles.

    Reply
  • we will become like animals if we stop our imagination and only feel sensations of our body.its not good to get lost in whirpools of mind but how will we being humans invent new things

    Reply
    • Hi Vaibhav,

      I don’t think anyone’s suggesting that we permanently move into a state of “only feeling sensations in the body.” It’s very useful to do this for periods of time in order to quiet the mind, but there’s a value in thinking as well. And actually, what I’ve found is that by getting out of those “whirlpools of thought,” genuine creativity arises. When the mind is cluttered with unnecessary thinking there’s no room for creative thoughts to arise.

      All the best,
      Bodhipaksa

      Reply
  • Vaibhav – I’ve founsd it useful to distinguish between ‘thinking’ and ‘having thoughts’. Thinking is the process which we are more in control of; when we are ‘having thoughts’ we are pushed from one place to another. Meditation allows us to think – and, therefore, if we wish, to allow genuine creativity to develop.

    Reply
  • Dear Bodhipaksa,

    Lately when I try to apply mindfulness in my daily life, I feel like I’m controlling myself or more specifically, repressing myself. Ultimately it makes me angry with the practice, because I don’t think I should repress any of my feelings, to the point of not wanting anything to do with meditation any more. It makes me feel like I’m rejecting myself, or telling myself that what I’m feeling is “wrong” and instead of being for example, angry about something, I should repress that and force myself to be calm instead. I understand mindfulness is not about control, but rather awareness, however it is very hard to distinguish it when I try to put into practice, and it only frustrates me. Is there any advice you can give me please? Thank you.

    Reply
  • Hi Andrea,

    I’m sorry to hear you’re having these difficulties. There’s nothing inherent in meditation practice, of course, that says that anger, or any other emotion, is “wrong.” It’s simply that some emotional states tend to lead to suffering, and others lead to greater fulfillment. It’s not a case of “right” and “wrong” but of “doesn’t make me happier” and “makes me happier.” And we’re not, ideally, repressing anything, but simply letting go of unhelpful emotions and trains of thought, and instead choosing to cultivate more positive ones.

    What’s going on with you is simply that habits you have are being brought to light. This is ultimately a positive thing, even if it’s uncomfortable, since you can’t learn to deal with those habits unless you become conscious of them. But of course you have to be conscious that repression is what *you do* rather than blaming “the practice.” The practice, after all, is not a thing external to you, but is simply what you do.

    So I’d suggest that you look for more acceptance and patience as you work with yourself. I don’t know if you’re doing lovingkindness meditation, but it’s very useful for helping us be less self-critical.

    You might also find mantra meditation useful, since it’s not so much about “doing anything” with our experience, but more about simply opening ourselves up to the experience of the mantra.

    Reply
  • I wanted to write a retort to Bodhipaksa’s response for Andrea. You say that some mental states lead to suffering, and that mindfulness is about letting go of certain emotions and cultivating others, but I very much disagree, or perhaps feel that the wording is misleading. Suffering comes from not being mindful toward any mental state. Anger is not suffering, running from or clinging to it is, just as clinging to something that causes joy leads to suffering. Is mindfulness not a way of passionately and fully engaging all mental states that leads from dukha? Andrea, I say to you, feel out your anger and explore it, just resist the urge to become it, to make yourself its victim, rather experience it as a sensation, and as you sit with it, it will naturally resolve, this is the way of satipanna.

    Reply
  • Hi Sam,

    You say “anger is not suffering” but this is neither traditional nor does it fit with my experience. You say that it’s running from or clinging to that is suffering, but anger is itself a form of running to or clinging to something we want or do not want to happen. It’s certainly better to be mindful of anger than not to be mindful of it, but if we’re mindful of our anger we’ll see that there is suffering tangled up in our anger.

    I also did not say that “mindfulness is about letting go of certain emotions and cultivating others.” In fact I never mentioned the word mindfulness in what I wrote to Andrea.

    Certainly, being mindful of and exploring our anger is one way to deal with it. But to say it’s “the way” is narrow, and potentially dogmatic. The Buddha offered a full “tool-kit” with which we can deal with unskilful mental states (see this sutta, for example), and to suggest that only one of those tools is legitimate would be unfortunate — even if to do so in certain vipassana circles is common these days.

    Reply
  • Interesting picture in this article, but that’s another topic for another day. In this thread of comments I do see that I am no longer “Buddhist”. I used to teach mindfulness and insight meditation, but realized that people were clinging to them like hard core football fans who don’t score touchdowns themselves, yet scream at the team on he field telling them how to do it.

    Kathaleen: Your panic attacks may be either a chemical imbalance, or a form of PTSD. I lean towards PTSD only because you mentiones anxiety. That mention goes a long way towards it being stress/PTSD related. Some psychotherapists will recommend mindfulness meditation as a treatment option. I would recommend a more modern version, but this isn’t the right place to discuss it.

    Andrea, dropping mindfulness practice for a short time is better than frustration building until you stop practicing all together. Instead we can focus on non-practice related activities for a few days. Let the mind meander, then in a few days turn the focus towards the mind and it’s mental processes. Explore some of the insight meditation practices. Insight meditation, when done properly and you actually gain insight, brings a natural mindfulness into your life. The whole of Buddhist derived practices revolve around “the middle way”…not to tight, not too loose. For some reason modern day practitioners tend to want to tighten the screws all the time.

    Reply
  • Hello Bodhipaksa,
    When one is practicing being mindful in daily life, should we allow distractions to get in the way of what we are currently doing (ex: getting work done or even watching a movie in a theater)? From what I have gathered mindfulness teaches to allow yourself to be with your emotion as it is happening, so what if strong thoughts or emotions come about when we are doing some task, should we try to focus on the event at hand or stop and be mindful of our emotions?

    Reply
  • Hi, Maximus.

    If a strong emotion comes up I think the emotion has to be addressed in some way. At least it has to be acknowledged.

    In meditation, I take the tack that if something keeps demanding our attention, then we need to give it our full attention. The emotion becomes the object of our meditation practice. It may not always be appropriate in everyday situations to do that, but at least you can acknowledge what’s going on and come back to it later.

    Reply
  • Hello Bodhipaksa,

    Thank you for reminding that all activities in our lives should be with mindfulness. I wished that in my elementary school they would have taught mindfulness meditation. I remember a report in the US where they used TM meditation in high school and it reduced violent urges and calmed down high school students.

    Thanks,
    Spencer

    Reply
  • How do you answer those who say meditation is a valid and scientifically proven method but only for relaxation, and nothing more, that the spiritual side is overhyped mysticism?
    I’m a little daunted by the claims that seeing this as anything more than relaxation is childish gullibility….I see it as more but wonder what you think.

    Reply
  • I’d just ignore them, Ted. No matter what you do in life there are bound to be people with contrary opinions. Those opinions are worth taking on board if they are reasonable and supported with evidence, but claims that meditation is good only for relaxation cannot, by definition, be supported by evidence.

    And I’m not sure what, in the “spiritual side,” these people would be arguing against. The jhanas? Lots of us have been there. Enlightenment? Again, plenty of people have some experience of this. Now a skeptic can argue that people who claim they’ve experienced the jhanas or enlightenment are deluding themselves, but that would be a dogmatic stance, and not one we should take seriously.

    Reply
  • Thank you so much. I appreciate and agree with your perspective given my own experience. I also have seen or felt a change in me for the good since I’ve been using the guided meditation on the development of loving kindness.
    There’s something here I’m excited about pursuing.

    Reply
  • Dear Friend,
    Is it okay if I try to be mindful/aware of myself–my body, my thoughts–as and when I am going about my daily things–walking, sitting, drinking my tea or just lying down on the bed, through much of the day? Or would this be obsessive and excessive?

    Reply
    • Hi, Yoginder. This is exactly what we’re meant to do. This would only be considered obsessive if there was anxiety, aversion, etc. involved — for example if you were continually worrying about whether you were being mindful enough, or being angry with yourself for not being mindful enough. And if those attitudes do creep in, then this is just another thing to be mindful of; notice those thoughts and let them pass. It’s also a good idea to bring as much metta/maitri (lovingkindness) into your day as you possibly can.

      Reply
  • Brother, Thanks for your reply. I have found that if I try to be in the present while doing anything by trying to be aware of my body/mind as they are at that moment as well as the thing I am doing/seeing/touching at that moment, it keeps me off thinking of the past and future. so, for instance, as i am typing these words, i am aware of my fingers touching the key board, the way i am sitting, the feel of the chair on my legs and so on….is that the way to do it? should i try and do this with every action of mine throughout the day? was this the way of Buddha and/or realised monks? i don’t want to feel that it is something that i am making up on my own!! [you know how the mind is–once i start doing this, the mind says, “maybe you are cooking it all up!”]

    i would be grateful, brother, if you could clarify these questions, and if you could kindly guide me to some Buddhist internet resources [such as essays by non-western monks] that deal with mindfulness and being in the moment in daily life [outside the formal meditation sitting]–resources that are based on suttas of the Buddha preferably

    with love
    yoginder sikand

    Reply
  • Hi, Yoginder.

    What you’re doing is entirely traditional. You might want to try Gunaratana’s “Mindfulness in Plain English” as a resource. At the moment I can’t think of anything on the web that’s by non-western monks. I’m sure there’s a lot there, but I’d basically end up doing what you can do yourself, which is to use Google :)

    All the best,
    Bodhipaksa

    Reply
  • I just wanted to say thankyou Bodhipaksa. After a particularly difficult night, following a particularly difficult year, I have found alot of peace just in the way that you write. Even without hearing your voice I found myself rested – by the way you write and from your words. So thankyou. Tonight will be a better night as a result of finding your site tonight. Regards.

    Reply
  • Thank you, TJ.

    Reply
  • Hi,
    First of all, thank you for the amazing articles!
    I was wondering if you could give me tips on how to incorporate mindfulness into daily life. I’m a university student – should I be more mindful during lectures or when doing homework? How would you suggest I do it? I tried doing it by being mindful of breath, but I found it just distracts me from understanding the subject.
    Somewhat unrelated – do you ever have problems with procrastination? Are there any mindful ways of dealing with that? Many thanks in advance!!

    Reply
    • Hi, Ranetka.

      I’d imagine that taking your attention to your breathing might not help you pay attention during lectures. Paying attention to your posture would, though. I teach a study skills and personal development course in an American university each summer, and one of the things I emphasize is good posture, which helps you to breath efficiently and to remain alert. And then mindfulness of the teacher’s voice, gestures, and actions (writing, etc.) is helpful as well. You also need to practice mindfulness of the topic being discussed, so that you’re trying to understand the “story” that’s being told. When unrelated thoughts come in, just let go of them.

      All the best,
      Bodhipaksa

      Reply
  • Hi, I am want to know a bit more about “Informal Mindfulness” in daily life, I am a bit confuse..
    I.e. when I am practicing mindful walking and I meet my friend, should I stop and socialize with them? or should I continue to do my mindful walk? It is kind of rude to ignore them if they want to talk to you.
    Same situational applies to mindful eating, when I am eating mindfully, can I socialize with my friend, I cant ignore them.
    I know mindfulness it about being present, so should I talk to them, then shift back my attention to my eating or walking, and when they talk to me again, I shift my attention to them? It is like shifting mindfulness from one task to another. It is possible?
    I hope you can provide me some insight. Thank you.

    Reply
  • Thank you so much for answering, :)
    Ya, I understanding what it means by “being present” in mindfulness now. But how about “Non-judgemental” because in situation like when i am mindfully talking to someone, can I smile, laugh or whatever?
    Or when i am doing mindful walking, when i am feeling pleasant, can I express it?
    Can being mindful makes you a emotionless robot?

    I am sorry for posting such stupid question, I am just a bit confuse about the “Non-judgemental” part. Thank you in advance for your advice.

    Reply
    • It’s certainly not a stupid question — it’s just a question about what a term means. Being “non-judgmental” means not reacting to things with aversion or ill will. So smiling, laughing etc. are not even close to being judgemental. When you’re feeling happy, express it! The sense that you shouldn’t express your happiness could, on the other hand, be a form of aversion, and a judgement that it’s “wrong” to be happy or express joy.

      Reply
  • By the way, sorry for questioning again, I need some clarification as I couldn’t find any answer on the web. It is regarding my previous post on 23rd of April about “Informal Mindfulness”. From your comment, can I deduce that the way i practice mindfulness is correct? The shifting mindfulness from one task to another, depend on which is the present one & priority?

    Reply
    • Well, how would it be helpful to ignore a friend when you’re out walking? Wouldn’t that be rather rigid and unfriendly?

      Reply
  • i have read osho and gurdjieff books and as far as i understood both of them teach us to keep a subtle awareness in our daily lives.gurdjieff called it self remembering while osho called it awareness but it requires extreme efforts to acquire this.

    Reply
  • Hi, I LOVE this site!!! thank you so much for all your work!! My question… I first started meditating when I was 22 and then it was off and on for many years. Recently, I meditating daily for 3 weeks + walking meditation and study. The benefits were noticeable both during sitting and during the day as I was able to watch extremely cunning negative thoughts and watch them quickly pass. However, I was offered a full time teaching job which happens to be a very demanding position, full of major stress. I am finding it very difficult to maintain any kind of mindfulness throughout the day. Any suggestions?

    Reply
    • Hi, Adam.

      There really are hundreds of ways to bring more mindfulness into daily life. You can take brief pauses for just two or three minutes in order to follow your breathing, or you can practice lovingkindness for those around you, or you can spend a mindful minute just listening, or you can be aware of your body as you walk, for example. You might want to read Jan Chozen Bays’ How to Train a Wild Elephant, which offers dozens of exercises designed to help you be more mindful.

      Reply
  • Hi,

    I’m interested in building in some simple, daily things I can do (and keep doing) like, especially during “transition times” during the day that might help me ground, release, let go and reattune in my daily life.

    I wonder if you might have some suggestions (maybe readings, too…).

    For example, one thing I try to do periodically, is remind myself to “half smile”. Another thing I try to link onto this behavior is to remember the Buddist principle, that “nothing is forever”. I’m trying to create “a cascade” of linked Buddist principles like this that might be fun and help me better assimilate like basic meditation practices into my daily life.

    I’m not sure I’m being clear about what I’m trying to do, but I thought I’d ask ?

    Peter

    Reply
    • It doesn’t seem unclear, but it’s a very expansive question, Peter. So rather than my writing a book-length comment full of suggestions, you might want to try looking at books like:

      • How to Train a Wild Elephant, by Jan Chozen Bays.
      • Shortcuts to Inner Peace, by Ashley Davis Bush.
      • The Miracle of Mindfulness, by Thich Nhat Hanh.

      These all contain numerous practices that you can bring into daily life.

      Reply
  • Is it normal and common that after practicing meditation, people start to sleep less hours?

    Reply
    • It’s quite common, yes. You also may find that you have more interesting dreams, at least at first, or when you do more meditation than usual.

      Reply
  • the ancient brain
    May 2, 2014 9:30 am

    To practice mindfulness, as has been said by many of the leading lights in meditation, is easy. The ‘hard’ part is to remember to do so. But the more you do it, the more the brain *remembers* to do it. So, the next time something unremarkable happens–make it remarkable. The flight path of two birds swirling around each other. The way that stones are arranged on the ground in an interesting fashion. I was startled last year by stepping out onto my front steps, only to be “confronted” by a hummingbird–it regarded me for a few moments, as I froze, taking in this amazing little creature and truly internalizing the moment. I dwelled in that moment for long after it passed–it was mindfulness practice that I was doing. I wasn’t thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, I was there, only just, with this creature. Remarkable. You can do this with anything–rain rushing down the street, the way the waning sun carves out shadows in the a stand of trees. Moments are everywhere to be experienced and dwelled in–we just have to allow ourselves to be with them! :)

    Reply
  • I was not sure where to post this question. So pardon me for posting it under meditation. I read a book about eightfold path. I wish the book would not only explain but also apply each path by mentioning examples of daily life that we all encounter at times.
    I am searching for good books that only deal with one path at a time in each book. So I need 8 individual books that are truly well written. Any recommendations?

    Reply
    • Hi, Sam. I’m afraid I’m not aware of any such book series. It’s a good idea, though.

      Reply
  • Hi Bodhipaksa

    I am new to the practice of meditation and mindfulness and I was hoping you could answer a simple question for me: does being mindful simply mean turning the inner dialogue onto the actions we are performing in the moment. Or is there more to it?

    Thank you for the reply x

    Reply
    • Hi, Naz.

      If you mean, do we simply change our inner talk so that we’re describing what we’re doing in the moment rather than thinking about unrelated events, then no, that’s not what it is. Mindfulness is a form of attention, and it’s essentially wordless. Just being aware of your experience is mindfulness. Describing to yourself what you’re experiencing may or may not be an aid to mindfulness. It’s sometimes done in meditation, and can be helpful. But sometimes the thinking can get in the way of the experiencing, which creates a kind of pseudo-mindfulness that can be rather alienating.

      Reply
  • Hi Bodhipaksa
    I have a question while I am trying to practice awareness or mindulfness. For example, when I am eating or walking or doing anything, I am saying to myself that ( the action performed ). But I found this practice stressing, even more than thingking about past or anything. It is like my mind is always busy ( walking, eating, driving, watching, talking, etc ) It can be compared as an alienating experience, it is like the experiencing is interrupted by the thinking. Would you mind telling me what am I doing wrong, and helping me to improve the practice of daily meditation ? I do not want to think on the action i´m performinb, but the thought of the action ( eating, walking, etc ) suddenly pops on my mind, and it is a little bit annoying.
    Thnak you very much.

    Reply
    • I can see how commenting on your experience could become alienating. I’ve heard of that happening.

      Mindfulness isn’t about keeping up an inner narrative about our experience, but about noticing our experience. It’s about really paying attention to what we’re seeing, hearing, feeling, and thinking. The more we can immerse ourselves in our actual physical experience, the less likely we’ll be to get caught up in our own heads.

      So when you’re walking, pay attention to the physical sensations in your body, and the sensations (visual forms, sounds, smells, etc) arising from the world around you. There’s a lot to pay attention to, and you can’t notice it all! But that’s not the aim. What we’re trying to do is just to be as present as we can, without being sucked into inner dramas.

      I hope this helps!

      Reply
  • Thank you very much Bodhipaksa for your kind words. Any advice about ending the inner narrative actions?
    Best regards

    Reply
    • Hi, Fernando.

      Ending the inner narrative is a tall order. It’s possible to do for short periods of time, but it takes a lot of training and practice. What we need to start with first is just noticing that we’ve become caught up in thinking, and letting go of it. Then we can allow thoughts to drift by, while keeping our awareness focused on the object of meditation. But if you want to know more specific techniques for calming the mind, you can search for “calmness” up above (or click on that link, which will save you the bother!) This particular article will probably be useful.

      Reply
  • Thank you for this site. Your articles have helped me tremendously in furthering my practice, reminding me to step back and observe where I am in my practice and what I need to work on, allowing it to happen in its’ own time. I Like to give myself queues, or a mental list if you will, to help remind myself to be mindful throughout daily activities, particularly repetitive, mundane tasks. It particularly helps for these moments since it is so easy to enter autopilot during these tasks such as doing the dishes, laundry, making tea having a shower. It turns out that doing the dishes can actually be quite fun when one is fully engaged.

    Reply
  • Well done.

    Reply
  • How do I practice mindfulness? I understand it is being aware in the present moment but what do I say to myself? Im talking about when im not meditating and just doing everyday things.

    Reply
    • You don’t necessarily have to say anything to yourself, Sean, although it can be useful to have little phrases or words that act as triggers for your mindfulness. “Am I aware right now?” could be one such phrase. Or any single word that evokes a quality of mindfulness or care could work as well.

      Reply
  • I try to be mindful.but sometimes a forget that I’m dong it. and it’s head to do.how can i do it continuously?

    Reply
    • It’s almost impossible to be continually mindful, Nisansala. I think the best we can do is to keep bringing the mind back into focus as often as possible. Using reminders like notes, random mindfulness bells, etc., we can prompt mindfulness more often, but we’re still going to have periods of unmindfulness. But that’s OK. We don’t have to be perfectly mindful — just mindful enough. And if we’re training the mind through meditation, then in our periods of unmindfulness the mind is going to be better behaved than it normally would!

      Reply
  • How to be aware while reading
    Book?

    Reply
    • I think it very much depends on the kind of book and why you’re reading it, Sanjeeb. If you’re studying, then it’s advisable to pause and reflect on what you’re reading, mentally making lists of key points and committing them to memory. The dangers while studying are that you read words without really understanding them, or you understand them but make no effort to remember them.

      If you’re reading a novel you can be aware of your feelings (including the feeling you get from reading words that are put together well or badly, but also feelings you have about the characters and situations). And you can be mindful of the thoughts and images that arise.

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Fill out this field
Fill out this field
Please enter a valid email address.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Menu