Posts by Bodhipaksa

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Wisely and kindly, Marshall Rosenberg introduces us to the principles of effective communication, showing how we can resolve conflicts by letting go of value judgments, skillfully expressing our feelings, communicating our needs, and practicing empathy.

Rosenberg is a remarkable man. I think of him as a Bodhisattva, although he’s not a practicing Buddhist. Actually he would probably not say he wasn’t a Buddhist nor say he was a Buddhist because he abhors labels. But labels aside, he travels the world continually, helping gangs to resolve their differences, helping Israelis and Arabs to find common ground, and helping native peoples to skillfully confront the developers who desire their land.

This book really is a revelation, and has transformed lives. There are so many times while reading this book that I realized, “Of course! That’s why that discussion degenerated into a fight.” And I don’t mean that this is one of these self-help books where you are able to see where others have made mistakes, but that this book hits you right between the eyes, showing you how much of what you thought was your insightful observation was actually life-denying judgment.

One of the more profound aspects of this book is the notion — one I happen to share — that all of our most destructive actions are in fact “the tragic expressions of unmet needs.” In other words, in the deepest core of our being is a — for want of a better word — trans-moral desire for wellbeing, life, connection, and wholeness. Its the misguided and non-empathetic way that we express those needs that’s the problem.

Rosenberg’s style will not appeal to everyone. In personal appearances (I was fortunate enough to be on a weekend seminar with him) he sings songs and illustrates points with glove puppets. And this was to an adult audience. Some of you will squirm. But I suggest you compassionately and empathetically experience your discomfort and get over it so that you can get the benefits that Rosenberg’s approach offers.

Another caveat — although NVC is not in essence a method, Rosenberg has a methodical way of introducing his key practices. The results, in terms of the examples of the use of NVC, can sound impossibly stilted and unappealing. However, these examples should be understood to have the same relation to Nonviolent communication in practice as a recipe does to a gourmet meal. The recipe on the page hardly has the appeal of the actual dish.

We think everyone could benefit from reading this book.

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Have you ever found yourself making impulse buys of things you don’t really need? Ever feel bad because you think you consume too much? Have you ever found yourself giving gifts to friends even though you were in debt? Perhaps you need to read this book.

This book, remarkably, is not only a systematic exploration of Buddhist practice, but also covers basic mindfulness teachings such as budgeting!

Kulananda lives a life of simplicity in a Buddhist community in Britain. Dominic Houlder is Dean of the Sloane Program at the London Business School. Both are practicing Buddhists, and together they’ve put together a book of practical wisdom to help us find financial peace, whether we follow the Buddhist path or not.

Drawing on traditional Buddhist teachings, illustrated by the experiences of many practicing Buddhists, and with numerous practical exercises, the authors show us how to become more aware in relation to money. They show how we can misuse money to try to feel complete, and how we can learn to find inner wealth in order to become more whole.

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One of Thich Nhat Hanh’s most popular books, Miracle of Mindfulness is about how to take hold of your consciousness and keep it alive to the present reality, whether eating a tangerine, playing with your children, or washing the dishes.

Nhat Hanh has a simple and direct style that communicates a profound sense of compassion. when he’s talking about sitting with someone who is in a state of distress and he says “I understood” you think, “Yes, he does understand. He really does.”

And as well as being compassionate, Nhat Hanh is also a master of how to communicate practice. He reminds us to wash the dishes as if they were sacred relics — a practice that helps bring a sense of care and aesthetic enjoyment into a mundane activity. He suggests over and over that we smile — a practice that reminds us that happiness is a choice. He is also of course famous for the mindfulness bell — a practice of stopping and paying attention to our present-moment experience.

A world-renowned Zen master, Nhat Hanh weaves practical instruction with anecdotes and other stories to show how the meditative mind can be achieved at all times and how it can help us all “reveal and heal.” Nhat Hanh is a master at helping us find a calm refuge within ourselves and teaching us how to reach out from there to the rest of the world.

There’s nothing complicated in this book, but then there’s nothing complicated about mindfulness. the difficult thing is to remember to do it, and Thich Nhat Hanh’s book is full of suggestions for reminding ourselves to be mindful.

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A friend tells me that many years ago Sharon Salzberg was very dismissive of the metta bhavana — or development of lovingkindness — meditation practice. Now her name is virtually synonymous with it.

This was her first book on the topic and it’s a good one. Assuming that my friend is an accurate source, whatever Salzberg was doing in the period between seeing lovingkindness practice as somehow inferior to vipassana (insight meditation) and her current embrace of it worked.

In this inspirational book on how to cultivate true happiness in ourselves and genuine compassion for others, by one of America’s foremost Buddhist teachers. Sharon Salzberg, a meditation teacher and the founder of the Insight Meditation Society in Massachusetts, focuses on the Metta Bhavana practice (also taught on Wildmind). This practice emphasizes the development of a loving and compassionate heart.

The book is clearly written, very practical and full of exercises, and is also full of a wealth of anecdotes. The only drawback to a book of this sort is that it’s impossible to remember all the instructions given in any one exercise, and yet opening your eyes during a meditation, finding your place on the page, and then reading a few more sentences in order to progress is not a very convenient approach. The reader would be advised to purchase a guided meditation CD in order to put the metta bhavana into practice, and to use the book as background reading.

For this reason the book will probably be best appreciated by those who have some experience with meditation already, but anyone can appreciate the way it takes a practice often considered mystical and turns it into a means of creating joy.

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Cartoons and commentary that blend humour with philosophy,”on the rocky road to nirvana with a Buddhist cat, a novice monk and a mouse hell-bent on cheese.”

There aren’t that many Buddhist humorists and so it’s a relief to welcome David Lourie to the fold. Lourie’s cartoons feature the interactions between Bodhi, a rather naive young monk; Dharma, an anything-but-naive cat; and Siam, a mouse who “goes with the flow” (he’s often in cahoots with the cat).

I didn’t find the humor laugh-out-loud funny, although it should also be noted that it takes a lot to get me laugh out loud and a friend sitting beside me at a viewing of “Monty Python and the Holy Grail” — a movie I found hilarious — asked me during the movie if I was feeling OK. But even I find these cartoons pleasing, and that can be taken as high praise!

The cartoon strip, Dharma The Cat, runs in small monthly magazines in 20 countries, and is translated into 10 languages. The web site has won the “10 Best On The Web” Award in the Humor Category, and it is on the BBC Online’s list of best educational sites.

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This warmly compassionate and practical book introduces you to the same meditation practices that are taught on Wildmind’s site, gives advice on how to set up a meditation practice and how to deal with any difficulties that may arise.

As well as introducing the mindfulness of breathing and metta bhavana practices, Paramananda, who is a gifted teacher, outlines the traditional hindrances to meditation and how to deal with them.

However the main thing we can take away from this book is not so much a method — a set of techniques, although that is certainly present — but a feeling for meditation and a sense of the need for sensitivity and openness to one’s experience.

This accessible and thorough guide is ideal both for those beginning a meditation practice and for those seeking to deepen an existing practice.

This is one of the most complete guides to the Buddhist tradition that I have come across. Not only that, but it’s accessible, practical, and lighthearted. Gary Gach is a talented writer who makes learning about Buddhism not only interesting but a great deal of fun as well. I think you’ll like it.

Like all the “Complete Idiot” guides the writing style is light, humorous, and fast-paced. There are illustrations and numerous sidebars to present quotes, definitions, comments and anecdotes.

You’ll learn about the Buddha’s life story, the various Buddhist traditions, the arrival of Buddhism in the west, and about the key teachings of Buddhism, such as the eightfold path, nonviolence, karma, meditation, etc.

There are special chapters on Vipassana, Zen, Pure Land, and Vajrayana Buddhism. There are also explorations of the intersection between Buddhism and western life: relationships, food, work, popular culture, science, and the arts.

There’s also a handy glossary (neatly titled “A Vocabulary of Silence.”)

All in all, this is a rare overview of Buddhism and a book well-worth having.