I am a forty-five-year-old woman who suffered a spinal injury thirty years ago that has resulted in a legacy of on-going physical pain. Of course this has been difficult to live with, but some twenty years ago I had a significant experience that radically changed my perspective on life and plunged me into the wonder of living in ‘the present moment’.
I was in an intensive care ward at the time, with an acute deterioration of my condition. I had been bedridden for several months and unable to sit up, but on this occasion I had undergone a diagnostic procedure that required me to sit up for several hours afterwards. During this long night of intense pain I felt myself sliding towards the edge of madness.
I spent hours with two internal voices locked in combat – one voice convinced I could not stay sane till morning and the other willing me to do so. It was an incredibly intense, brittle, heart-breaking experience.
Then, suddenly, my experience completely changed when I heard a quiet inner voice saying: “You don’t have to get through till morning; you only have to get through the present moment”. It was like a house of cards collapsing, revealing the space that had been present all along, if only I could have recognised it. My experience immediately changed from an agonised, contracted state to one that was soft and rich – despite the physical pain. At that moment of relaxing into the present moment, just as it was, I intuitively knew I had tasted something true.
I later found a way of making sense of this experience through the teachings of Buddhism and have spent the past 20 years training my heart and mind, using meditation and mindfulness. I was ordained into the Western Buddhist Order in 1995 and for several years I have taught meditation and mindfulness practice to others who live with pain and illness.
Below are some tips and pointers drawn from the methods I have developed that you mind find helpful if you are living with discomfort or pain. Please explore these as you wish, alongside any other treatments or therapies you may be receiving. Mindfulness practice can ‘complement’ conventional medicine in a helpful way.
She runs courses in Manchester UK for people suffering from chronic pain and illness, teaching them how to optimize quality of life using meditation and other mindfulness-based strategies. She also is involved in running a training program for those wishing to deliver the Breathworks programme in other localities.
She suffered a spinal injury in 1976 and has used meditation and mindfulness to manage her own chronic pain for many years.
Vidyamala’s CDs of guided meditations — developed as part of her Breathworks pain management program — are available for sale in our online store.
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please let me know the best cd i can order for pain. I have lower limb neurapathy, burning foot pain , tendonitis in both hands and back pain
Hi, Thomas. It's hard to say which is the best, but Jon Kabat-Zinn is the master in this field, and I'd recommend his Mindfulness Meditation for Pain Relief.
HI Frank.
I am so sorry to hear about your pain. I would concur with Bodhipaksa re Jon Kabat-Zinn's CD. If you want more guided meditations then I would recommend the Body Scan I recorded that is specifically for people with pain, that is available on the wildmind store. Happy xmas and New Year!
Hi I think I was meant to find this website. I have had arthritis since I was 11years old I have also been diagnosed with a.bowel disorder and fibromyalgia I have taken loads of different medications all causing other side effects and problems. I have lived with constant suffering for 27 years I still work full time and am a carer for my elderly father I refuse to give in. I know this pain will not last forever all things will pass so I stay strong. I would love to attend a breathworks course in the evenings or preferably on a saturday I live in Manchester. Thanks Mary x
Hi Mary,
I am responding to you as Vidyamala is away at the moment. Thank you for your email. Although it sounds like you live with incredibly challenging circumstances, you also seem determined, enthusiastic and positive. I have lived with chronic pain since I was 19 (29 years ago) and can assure you that, for me, attending a Breathworks course was a turning point in my relationship to my pain, circumstances, work, relationships - everything.
There a couple of choices for you at the moment regarding Breathworks courses. A distance learning online course will begin on March 11th which was very successfully trialed last year and is currently available at a reduced cost of £110-. For information about that , please follow the link below.
https://www.breathworks-mindfulness.org.uk/index.php/breathworks-courses/pain-a-illness/online-group-course
If you would prefer to attend the course in person then you can contact the Manchester Breathworks office on 0161 834 1110 to put your name on the waiting list for the next course - date to be confirmed.
If you need any more assistance from me, please call me on 0121 454 7646 and I will do whatever I can to help.
All the best,
Karen
Hi, I'm a 45 year old female, I am suffering from CRPS Nerve dama ge in my left foot due to a surgical procedure. Ive been in pain now for the past 7/8 years, ive not been able to work for the past year, but ive been unable to fulfil my work commitments for the past 4years. Because its nerve damage the pain travels up my leg into the lower part of my back and sometimes into my left arm, all the pain is on my left hand side. I followed a link to you which was sent by my friend, in hope that you could give me some information on what kind of meditation I could use to perhaps alleviate some of my pain.
Kind regards
Lynda
Hi Lyn,
thank you for getting in touch. My name is Karen & I am replying on behalf of Vidyamala, who is away at the moment. I am sorry to hear you've been through such difficult times for the last 8 years. Pain and all it's effects on our lives can be unbearably difficult at times.
You asked for some information on the kinds of meditation that would help to alleviate your pain. I suggest finding a local course that teaches mindfulness meditation. At Breathworks, we teach mindfulness on our 'Living well with pain & illness' courses - you can find the locations of accredited Breathworks teachers on our website - https://breathworks-mindfulness.org.uk/index.php/breathworks-courses/pain-a-illness.
If there are no courses starting just now, there are lots of C.D's with guided mindfulness meditations available which you can begin to use at home until you find a course locally - again, our online shop has several of those available, that we use on our courses for people living with chronic pain.
Your library can get you a copy of Vidyamala's book, 'Living well with pain & illness: the art of living mindfully', which other people have found helpful in learning to live with their chronic condition. I've attached a link below to an interview with Vidyamala where she talks about her history and how mindfulness meditation helped her to improve her quality of life - it has a short guided meditation at the very end of the interview.
https://bcove.me/io2nj8wx
There are great books by Jon Kabat-Zinn on this subject and he also has a series of guided meditation CD's that you might find helpful.
There are online Breathworks mindfulness courses available, but if you can find a course in your vicinity, I recommend joining it. In my own experience pain can be isolating for many people and we can become depressed by its constant presence as well as the impacts on other aspects of our lives - doing a course with a group of people who have similar experiences to our own and who can understand what we're going through can bring great relief as well as introduce a social interaction that can be incredibly positive & uplifting.
There may be a pain management center near you (do you have a pain consultant who is helping you manage your condition - they might have more information on this subject too) that runs courses that include mindfulness meditation or there may be a support group or charity that funds courses like our Living Well with Pain & Illness course.
If you would like to speak to me to learn a little more about what the courses involve, please call me on 0788 912 9628 and I'll give you more information. I hope that this reply is helpful and if I can do anything else, please don't hesitate to get in touch,
Karen
Dear Lynda I'm very sorry to hear about your pain which sounds very tough. Thanks for reaching out. I think the best thing would be for you to join one of our online groups for a 10 week mindfulness for health course. This is designed specifically for people like you. Go to https://breathworks-mindfulness.org.uk/index.php/breathworks-courses/pain-a-illness/mfh-distance-learning for more info. If you're just looking for a meditation then I recommend the boy scan which you can get from the wild mind store. I wish you all the very best. Vidyamala
Hello again. Karen has written a very good reply. And I recommended the 'boy scan' which my be a novel meditation, but of course I meant the 'body scan'. Best wishes with your journey
I have been in pain for some 30 years due to multiple health issues. In recent years the very ovetstretched NHS has had me on their wards.I have found the understaffing has led to a more and more 'unkind' environment in which basic physical needs are not met,neglect is constant,and medical mistakes constant. Ihave to continuallyvbe on my toes to ensure I am getting the correct treatment.My GP has been fantastic and very much on my side,and at various points I have had apologies for poor hospital care -some written.Nursing staff lack not only basic knowledge but have become hardened by poor working conditions and staff shortages.I am now being treated for anxiety caused by my hospital stays and my difficult experiences. I often feel dehumanised and frightened in hospital. I have frequentlyseen others experience similar fear. How can I learn to cope better in these brutal places,and find some peace amidst the pain,noise and chaos?
Hi Shirley.
In the circumstances you describe, I'd suggest lovingkindness meditation -- both directed at yourself and at those around you. When you direct lovingkindness at yourself, make sure that you accept your own suffering, and treat it with tenderness and care. And direct your kindness toward others as well; this will take your mind off of yourself and help you feel better. And it'll also help you be sympathetic to the staff as they do their impossible job.
It's such a shame that modern management does this to people. It's so short-sighted.
Post Script to my previous comment and question. Almost always patients support each other- both in practical help, and in trying to find something to smile about, but my fear and anxiety gets worse each time I am admitted,and tethered to my bed there is no place to be still and quiet. I say all this not to critisise staff who are usually working more than flat out,but because I believe this is now becoming a more and more common experience for people like myself faced with chronic conditions and pain.