Hi, I’m Bodhipaksa, and I set up Wildmind in 2001 with the help of several friends who offered me their time and technical support when I was a grad student with no financial resources at all. I’m a member of the Triratna Buddhist Order, I’ve been a practicing Buddhist since 1982, and I’ve been teaching meditation since the late 1980’s.
I’m the author of Wildmind: A Step-by-Step Guide to Meditation, a book called Living as a River, which explores the Buddhist teaching of not-self though a traditional reflection on interconnectedness called the Six Element Practice, and Vegetarianism: A Buddhist View, which is a book on Buddhism and the practice of vegetarianism. Additionally, I’ve written I Can’t Believe It’s Not Buddha! (a book on fake Buddha quotes), This Difficult Thing of Being Human (on self compassion), and A Year of Buddha’s Wisdom (which is a collection of daily readings, reflections, and meditation suggestions). I’m also the author of ten audiobooks of guided meditations.
In Oct 2012 gave a TEDx talk on compassion.
I was given the name Bodhipakṣa when I joined the Triratna Buddhist Order in 1993 (although at that time it was called the “Western Buddhist Order”). “Bodhi” means enlightenment and “paksha” (there’s a dot under the “s” which gives it a “sh” sound) means “wings.” So my name means “Wings of Enlightenment.”
I was born and brought up in Scotland, although I now live in the US. For three years, I was the director of Dhanakosa retreat center, in the Highlands of Scotland, and after that I ran the Edinburgh Buddhist center. For three years, I taught Buddhist meditation in the Religious Studies department at the University of Montana, before moving to New Hampshire.
I love teaching meditation. It’s had a tremendously positive effect on my own life, and I’ve seen it have an equally large effect on the lives of my students. Over and over again, students have told me how learning to meditate has changed their lives.
For many years I’ve been excited by the potential for bringing the benefits of meditation to millions of people over the Internet. That enthusiasm is what led to me setting up Wildmind.
Wildmind started as a project while I was completing a Masters degree in Montana. Supported by a grant from the American Council of Learned Societies, I worked with Dr. Alan Sponberg to develop an innovative Internet based meditation course for the University of Montana, and that experiment formed the basis of Wildmind.
I hope you find these materials useful, and I’d love to hear from you. Please feel free to drop me a line using the comment form below. If you want to write more privately use the “contact” link above — the message will get to me.
I also have a personal website where you’ll find links to all my publications, YouTube videos, etc., as well as information about the meditation coaching that I do. It’s at Bodhipaksa.com.
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Hello!!
I wanted to thank you for being there when I was distraught - 8 years ago - lived in California at the time. I found your website and did all the courses you offered Breathing Meditation, Metta, Vipassana and Identifying anger.
It was wonderful and has been life changing. I have now moved to Mass and belong to the New Kadampa Tradition and have a wonderful Sangha and participate in 2 weekly sessions with them along with my personal practice. Wildmind was the best gift for me.
thank you and keep on doing the wonderful work
I'm glad to hear that we were able to help you on your path, Kum Kum, and wish you well in the future.
Hi,
While meditating I usually concentrate on the sensation of air going in and out of the tip of my nostril, but I'm not sure where to concentrate during the times in between breaths?
Should I continue focusing on the tip of my nostril even during the in between breaths when there is no sensation of air moving past?
Love the website!
Thanks!!
Hi, Bob.
Sure, keep your focus on the same area. There's never no sensation -- the sensations just become subtler. And you can also notice the growing physiological need to inhale or exhale. It's quite fascinating to see those desires come into existence.
hey bodhipaksa,
i have been meditating regularly for 21 days. I have been running across some things on the internet that say, meditation is bad....and a lot of other gibberish. it make me feel a little uncomfortable reading those things, what is your viewpoint on this?
thank you
Vrajesh.
Hi, Vrajesh.
Bear in mind that "information on the internet isn't always reliable; that's the first thing I'd suggest. There are hundreds of scientific studies being done every year now, investigating the effects of meditation on pain perception, stress, memory, etc. I can't say I keep up with them all, but I read about all those that appear in the press, and they're all showing the benefits of meditation without suggesting any downside. And from my personal experience I've taught thousands of people, and been in contact with thousands more meditators. I see only good. Of course sometimes meditation brings people face-to-face with their problems in a very direct way, but it also gives them an opportunity to work with those problems. I've never, however, seen it cause any problems.
Bodhipaksa,
I understand what you mean, maybe its an insecurity of mine to not be confident within myself which is why i keep looking for reassurance for meditation.
A obstacle i have run into while meditating is that i cannot relax at all. In my 20+ days of meditating its very hard for me to reach a good "concentration" and calmness. I start to feel frustrated shortly. My breathing still seems unnatural or even if it does start to become "smooth" my mind comments ten things on it. i have stopped for a few days to re-evaluate and will start fresh next month.
My mind wanders even during the body awareness stage. By the time i reach my thighs i have started to think about something.
Any advice about the letting go of the breath. My chest tightens up after a while.
Vrajesh
Everyone's mind wanders, Vrajesh. Once you start to realize that your mind is just like that of everyone else, you can feel less anxious that you're a "bad meditator." Bear in mind as well that 20 days is not very long to have been meditating. There's a lot to learn. You wouldn't expect to be fluent in a new language after 20 days, even if you practiced a couple of hours each day.
When you feel this frustration arising, just notice it. Notice exactly where the frustration is in your body. Recognize that it's a painful feeling. And be as kind as possible with it. Give it your love, like you would reassure a frightened child.
Hello Bodhipaksa,
I came here once again to ask you a question because maybe you could help me out once again. I have done the meditations that you have given on this website or the wild mind book. Shortly after i switched to vipassana where i would focus my attention on the stomach and note using a 'mantra' like rising falling, feeling, thinking etc etc. I just recently finished a 10 day intensive meditation retreat and they also practice vipassana but they focus their attention by starting from the top of the head and keep moving your attention from part to part and remaining equanimous and aware without craving or aversion to any sensations.
Now here is the deal. I cannot pick one. its so frustrating. when i meditate theres constant inner chatter about why i am doing this one and why i should do the other one etc etc. theres also questions like does this meditation suit my logic better or does that one...and then i only feel discouraged to meditate because i just cannot make a decision on which one to do. I still somehow just sit and manage to observe breath and keep coming back to it. I sometimes do the top of the head to the bottom by moving my attention from part to part.
What do you suggest? Why is this so frustrating? Did you ever experience anything like this? I need to decide because i cannot dig different wells in 10 different locations expecting water from each one. I have to focus on one but i really have trouble deciding. Maybe its because of my anxiety and restlessness and not being able to see clearly. Maybe because each teacher i listened to, i like different things about all of them and things that i did not like about their teaching?
Any advice could be helpful.
Vrajesh.
Hi, Vrajesh.
I've had experiences that are similar in some ways to this. I once went on a retreat run by teachers who have a different approach to me in order to learn more about their techniques and perspectives, and I found that some of the things they said plunged me into doubt and confusion -- and aversion. I found myself continually arguing about things that they had said and about how they made no sense. There was one statement in particular that I thought was completely contrary to the Buddha's teaching, and it threw me into turmoil for two days, until I had a chance to talk to the teacher who had said this thing. When I asked her about what she'd said, she replied, "Oh, I didn't really mean that -- it's just something I say to the beginners." So sometimes these confusions are apparent, and if you did deeper you find that two seemingly different approaches aren't as different as they might seem.
The Buddha taught many different meditations: anapanasati leading to jhana, meditations leading to the formless spheres, metta bhavana and the other brahmaviharas, six element reflection (and four- and five-element reflections), etc. They're all valid and complementary, and the practice of one enhances the experience of the others. If you hear anyone saying that there's only one way to meditate, they're either misinformed or selling something.
The metaphor of digging many wells isn't, I think, very appropriate. Let's change the metaphor, and say that you're trying to clean rock-hard mud off of a jewel. You'll probably want to use many tools -- soaking it in water, chipping away touch parts, rubbing it, scrubbing it. You're taking many different approaches -- but to one end. There's really only one task.
That task, in Buddhist practice, is what I call "unselfing." Any practice you're doing is reducing your sense of having a fixed and separate self. Some of the approaches are "samatha" and some are "vipassana," but they're all unselfing. So it may be that you need to have this kind of coherent sense of what it is that you're actually doing. Deep down, there's no conflict between these practices. And in fact because they're all doing the same thing, but in different ways, they're all complementing each other.
You may find it's useful to have a schedule, and to plan out what practice you're going to do on any given day: body scan on Monday, Mindfulness of Breathing on Tuesday, Metta Bhavana on Wednesday, etc. That might give your mind permission to be content with what you're doing on any particular day.
Hopefully this is helpful. If it isn't, please let me know.
Wow, Thank you SO much! This helped greatly! Instinctively i did do exactly what you have advised. The cleaning of the jewel does make things easier for me to understand and how all practices help each other and lead to the same goal as to say.. Since meditation is to be done on a momentary basis rather than to attain a goal or a state. (i learned this the hard way).
I did the body scan yesterday and today i did another type of technique (also vipassana). I will certainly make a schedule and stick to it thoroughly, because then i can also know that i am not just doing one meditation because its easier or i like it more than the other.
Sometimes i like using a word along with the awareness of the sensation because it calms my mind a little and some other time when my mind is calm i can easily do the body scan and just observe the sensations without the conflict and chatter.
I have also developed a habit to just listen to meditation teachers who talk about benefits of meditation, insights etc because it almost seems like an entertainment rather than practicing.
Right now temporarily i can try this little experiment for a while so i continue to meditate, but don't you think that one has to learn one technique properly and progress in that?
Vrajesh
"...don’t you think that one has to learn one technique properly and progress in that?"
Well, yes and no :) There's a benefit to practicing different styles of meditation. I would never advise someone to take up mindfulness of breathing only, or metta bhavana only. These practices are complementary and they feed each other. I would advise people to take up a samatha approach to meditation without much vipassana -- at first. But then both vipassana and samatha are complementary as well. The Buddha said that jhana helps us to practice vipassana, and that vipassana helps us to practice jhana. A bird needs two wings to fly.
So I think the thing is to get good at practicing a suite of meditation practices, not just one. Otherwise you're like a carpenter who is skilled with a chisel, but doesn't know how to use a saw...
But I think each person will discover for him or sehr-self that they have a "lead" practice -- one that they find more rewarding and that produces more benefits. And in a way could be doing the other practices as a support for that practice. So to learn one technique properly and progress in it you will almost certainly find it useful to do other practices as well.
Thank you very much. You have helped me a lot and let me continue my meditation with more peace and calm. Hopefully i can sustain it.
Vrajesh.
I'm very glad to hear this, Vrajesh.
hi, i'm an university in South Korea, and i'm studying about buddhism. Everytime we have class, we try meditation to calm down our mind and find inner peace. To study more, i found this website . and i want to know more about this site but unfortunately, my English is not really good, so there are some parts that i can't fully understand. So can you please introduce me about this website? i mean i want to know more about what meditation really is.
Hi, Olivia.
I'm afraid it's not really practical for me to give you individual instruction in meditation in these comments. There are online translation tools such as https://translate.google.com that will translate my writings into Korean, or if you have specific questions about any of the articles you can ask a question in the comments field that you'll find on every page.
Hello Bodhipaksa,
I am writing to you because, i feel really frustrated about meditation. I have been meditating for quite a while now. Have tried many different techniques and stuck with them for a certain period of time, and to sum it up, i just feel more frustrated. I want to be able to "succeed" at meditation, however thats possible. I have done a 10 day intensive retreat had a hard time through it. I am going through depression but i want to not be in this place, and see a way out. I thought meditation could be that thing which could help me but it has only brought me disappointment. Everytime i think about meditation the next thought is frustration. I want to have positive experiences, and increase my awareness and live a better life. Seems it has just been the opposite. I know there are no magical words that you can type to help me understand meditation better or help me meditate, but since you are a meditator who has stuck with his practice can maybe say why i keep failing. I know its up to me to figure out why i keep failing but maybe you can help me.
I know its as simple as silently repeating a mantra, or just focusing on breath but i always make it complicated, and also get frustrated very easily when i don't relax or feel better.
When i mediate i usually lay down, because sitting feels very uncomfortable to me. I also do it sometimes sitting up when i have the energy and feel fresh. I do it lying down when i feel more depressed and stressed than usual.
Vrajesh.
Hi, Vrajesh.
Maybe it'll help if I tell you there's no such thing as "meditation." There's only "meditating."
If we think in terms of "meditation" then we thing there's this thing that's going to helps us. It's going to do something for us and make us happier, just like a pill might make us happier. But really there's just "meditating," which is an activity that we do. And how we feel after doing it depends on how we do it. So if you do it while grasping after results, then you'll probably feel disappointed. If you do it with aversion toward your experience you'll probably feel frustrated. If you do it with no effort then you'll probably be bored. If you do it without expectation, just accepting where you are, and with a gentle effort to pay attention to your experience, then you'll tend to feel more relaxed, calm, and happier.
Anyway, I'd suggest that you just relax with your unhappiness. Let go of any stories you're telling yourself. Let the thoughts go as soon as you realize you've been caught up in them. Notice that you're in discomfort, and be OK with that. Just allow the discomfort to be there. Relax with it. And breathe, without any expectations. Just breathe with your discomfort. Don't try and do anything else; just see what happens.
Bodhipaksa,
We must have just missed each other in Montana. I was a student there from 1994-1998 and studied under Saramati eventually moving into the community there with a few other wild minded young men a couple of whom I'm sure you know. At the time the meditation class was taught by Saramati as a lab with the Intro to Buddhism course. I've recently reconnected with Buddhapalita and Varada and they told me about your website. I've only begun to peruse the scope of what's here but I love the ice balls and the article about Do Buddhists Pray?
I'm quite interested in finding a sangha again and Buddhapalita and Varada suggested the online sangha offered by you. I now live in the mountains of North Carolina, near Boone, and have only recently connected with a few other Buddhists who also lament the lack of Buddhist Community here. Anyway, thank you for all you offer here and I will certainly become more acquainted with the resources here with time.
Nick